So, motivation is zero! OK, so I’ve lost another pound, I’ve tentatively started Tai Chi but with no real conviction. It’s not even about what I look like for me, it’s about being healthy with no creaking bones, aching legs, getting out of breath.

At this stage, when I have at least 5 stone to lose, it does not feel like I’m on the road to success! Despite setting goals, knowing what I need to do and what and how much I need to eat and feeling absolutely fine otherwise, I decided to dig deep, put my talking therapist head on and looked inside my own head and what is going on around me that is stopping me getting off my large backside and bloody doing something and practise what I bloody preach!

If someone came to me with the same issues, how would I help them? First of all, I would be fired up with enthusiasm that I could help someone change their lifestyle into a healthier and happier one. I would suggest exercise and diet changes, give them recipes and top tips, advice on shopping, a meal planner, maybe even a food diary, I’d tell them how fabulous and worth it they are, I would encourage them to be kind to themselves, love themselves, they would be inspired and motivated because they had me; a friendly shoulder, someone to tell them nice things, that they were no longer alone.

Is that it, I don’t have a me? Am I alone? Oh my God, I think I am.

I have lived in my present place for 4 years now, I’ve had a new relationship to concentrate on and in my job I have always been the ‘boss’ so that in itself ruled out all of the women I worked with as potential friends, I think you lose respect for your boss if you work and play with your team. I 'know' lots of other women that I have come to meet in the area - through my new relationship mostly, and although they are fab, friendly and funny, no deep relationships have been formed, for whatever reason.

I do have three deep female relationships but none of them live within a ‘let’s-go-and-have-a-coffee/wine/meal or let’s get our hair/nails/makeup done sort of distance. I think that’s it, I don’t have a girlfriend that I can share what girls share, swap clothes, unload on, listen to, laugh and cry with, all that stuff, but most importantly, the way that girls give each other kind words of motivation, boost each other’s self-esteem and generally buoy each other up. They say best friends are the best therapy!

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I guess the moral of this fighting the flab to be healthier story is that we can be more successful in our lives with a sister by our side, keeping us motivated and in turn loving ourselves enough to want to be healthier. If you are de-motivated and need a ‘sister’ call me!

Denise x